Why, Hello! May I Move In, Too?
What a wonderful weekend! Had one of those gorgeous oxygen facials I highly recommend Saturday, and then that evening it was off to The Four Seasons in Yorkville for An Evening With Diahann Carroll. Lots of local luminaries: Michael King and his beau, David, Salah Bachir, Mathieu Chantelois, Tracey Sandilands, Mark Singh, John Kenyon, Valerie Pringle and hub, Rolyn Chambers, David Walberg, Jann Coppen, Shinan Govani … long list. Billy Newton-Davis and John Alcorn and Lorraine Segato opened the night through dinner, and then Diahann Carroll took over.
Holy. Shit. True star, and I want to be like that in my ’70’s. Sold it from the first note, got the room’s full focus, was sardonic and irreverant and jaw-droppingly amazing. Her set was over far too soon, then she was gone. Sometimes life hands you the chance to see someone truly remarkable perform, and you’re grateful to have had the opportunity. This was one of those nights. My first new column with Xtra! comes out Thursday and it’s all about Carroll.
Hey, it’s spring cleaning time on the show today! We’ve got an expert coming in to talk about how to attack the mess inside, and our gardening expert Edgar Friars is coming by too to talk about how to attack the mess outside. Tune!
Meanwhile in Genoa City, it’s a short week thanks to the CFL NHL MLB some “important” sport activity taking over CBS. We’re grateful, as the Katherine storyline shows no signs of ending. Jill STILL doesn’t believe it’s Katherine (aaaaaaack!), the DNA tests say she’s not Katherine (meaning she’s not really Jill’s mother, we suspect!), and so Katherine once again takes off …
So does Amber, in search of Kevin. Oh, sure, cops can’t find him, even when he casually exits banks wearing a huge Chipmunk head, alarms sounding everywhere, but we know Amber will. We especially know as Christine Fix from Soaps.com told us Kevin will make Amber rob a bank with him at gunpoint this week. Fun!
Clint, meanwhile, is dead, dead, dead, of a heart attack, it seems. Kevin has dragged him into the closet he was being locked in, which must start to stink very soon, we think. But then, do chipmunks mind stink?
Phyllis spies Billy going into Sharon’s room and tries to get Nick there in time to catch the fun, but Nick arrives too late. Sharon goes ballistic on Phyllis, but then has a full on breakdown in front of her arch enemy, stealing an ugly little knick-knack on her way out the door. It doesn’t go unnoticed by our redheaded friend, who licks her lips it’s all so delishus.
Sharon decides to move back into the Abbott mansion with Jack, which is amazing, because Chloe decides to move back into the mansion with Billy. ”This will make is so easy to bone my sister-in-law,” Billy thinks when he realizes the set up.
Victor arranges for his son to be released from prison, due to the fact he’s now got Hopeitis and can’t see a damn thing. Orders the judge: “Mr. Newman, your son is now serving the rest of his sentence as your responsibility.” ”That’s fine,” mumbles the billionaire. ”Years ago I locked up my ex-wife’s lover in a dungeon on the ranch. I am very well-versed on imprisonment. We’ll do full Martha Stewart; put an ankle bracelet on him!”
Meanwhile, Victor’s new agent in deception, Mary Jane Benson, meets with Jack as step one of Their Plan. “You have an amazing face for television,” Jack tells her. ”All angles. By the way, did you know I once knew a Mary Jo Mason?”
And The Last Word goes to … Sharon! “I’ve just been in this strange place lately. I’ve been in a fog. I’m waiting for the fog to lift and I can’t feel my feet on the ground!”
Bonus Last Word goes to … Phyllis! ”I guess you can’t feel the air under your feet, but you can feel the mattress under your back.”
